Friday, November 27, 2009

Black Friday Kicked My Ass

I'm exhausted. I just got home after many many many hours of shopping. And I feel pretty good about all of my amazing deals.

I had a few surreal experiences today. First and most exciting, I made one of my dreams come true today. I bought my daughter the Barbie Dream House. I almost started to cry. For real. I know it sounds silly, but to me it was a pretty big deal.

When I was little, I wanted that Barbie Dream House so badly. My cousin Rhonda had it and I was so jealous I wanted to spit nails. I had a doll house, and it was nice. But it wasn't the Barbie Dream House with the three stories and a working elevator that you pulled with a string. When I had my baby girl, I imagined all the fun girly things I could introduce to her. Glittery bling, hair bows, earrings and jewelry, baby dolls and princesses and pink stuff. And of course, Barbies. Yeah, I know. Barbie is kind of a whore now, but really, who isn't? I'm not gonna judge. Oh I can't wait to play, um I mean, watch Boo play with her new Barbie Dream House!

The second surreal moment of the day: I ran into that nasty woman who fell in my house again. I know! What the heck? I think she saw me this time, but I looked away. But gee whiz, twice in one week? This is definitely not the week to buy a lottery ticket.

The third surreal moment: I ran into one of Uberman's ex-girlfriends. And that my friends, was awesome. She looked like crap. And kept making excuses for looking like crap. Which was awesomer. And guess what else? She has a huge ass. And hey, don't judge me. You know she is home right now telling her husband she saw me and I have a big ass, too. But at least I left the house looking pretty adorable and wearing makeup. I know. I am totally going to hell. Oh but you should have seen her! Hanging all over my MIL and "Oh it's so good to see you! I think of you so often!" Excuse me while I dry heave.

And it was right about then that I called it a day. And now I am home, in my jammies, and trying to relax a little. I am tired. Dog tired. Black Friday dog tired.

But happy. And looking forward to the holiday season! Decorating tomorrow, woo hoo!


Trisha said...

Black Friday is like a nightmare to me. I hate crowds and shopping so combining both . . . not a good mix! It sounds like you had fun though - besides seeing the woman who fell in your house!

DutchMac said...

CLEARLY someone upstairs intends for you to speak to Trippy McBitch. It's not an 'accident' for you two to keep ending up at the same place at the same time. This could end up being a whole lot of fun for you to explore .... not to mention all the blogger fodder it could give you. :-)

You up for another dare? I double-dog-dare you to go up and say 'hi' next time you see her, just to find out what she'll do.

Up for accepting this challenge?

Coffee Bean said...

Oh. My. Gosh. I SO LOVE YOU APRIL!!! Since I've been on facebook I've hooked up with a lot of people from the past. I cannot tell you the JOY I felt when we hooked back up with several of my husband's ex-girlfriends. Yeah... it is that gooooooooood. I may be fat but... they are FATTER!!! YEE HAW!!! We'll have to meet up in hell for a drink!