Wednesday, July 22, 2009

And I Hadn't Even Been Drinking...

So last night Ubes was working late and the kids were in bed and so I should have been doing laundry and dishes and stuff, but of course I was on Facebook. In my own defense I did scrub a toilet and wash my bathroom rugs. So there. Oh and I started the dishwasher.

So naturally after all of that I was exhausted and needed to rest. I am getting old after all.

And you know how I know I am getting old? My twenty year reunion is coming up. I know, I know. We have already discussed this but this is my blog and I feel like talking about it again. Mmmkay?

I am pretty much decided that I am NOT going. Dee won't go with me. Even if I beg. A few people have asked me on FB if I am going and I keep saying no. It's a week after we get back from the cruise and I am just not sure I want to spend the money because it's crazy expensive. And if it were not for FB I would not be in touch with ANY of these people. Except for Dee, of course.

But you all know me and how I hate missing out on all the fun....

So I sent a message to one of my former classmates, someone I talk to quite often on FB. I thought I would share this message with you all. Because it is awesome. This is the kind of stuff I put out in the universe when I am mentally and physically exhausted:

[High School Friend] -

I just spent about twenty minutes typing you this big novel of a message about the reunion and my computer started acting like a [douche]. I am so pissed.

So basically I was asking if you are going and then telling you why I am not sure if I want to go. It was the greatest message ever. And now it's lost forever. Years from now someone is going to find my hard drive in a landfill and recover that message and it will become some epic movie, just you wait and see. I hate my effing computer.

So? Do you think you will go? I'm a little pissed that it costs so much money to be honest. Do I really want to invest $200 (not including cost of a sitter) and all the time it will take talking my husband into going, to sit in a room full of people I haven't talked to in 20 years???

I mean the ten year kind of sucked. (I thought it did anyway.) Everyone was still broken off in the same old cliques. All the guys spent their time talking about how hot Stacey [Former Cheerleader] was and all the girls spent their time gossiping about Shanda [Former Mean Girl]'s new nose. It was stupid (the conversation, not Shanda's new nose, that was amazing). Plus the food was terrible.

And I am chubby. And I just don't want to have to wear a t-shirt that says "Yeah, I got fat. I'm aware." Seriously, why do I care what people think? Right? I'm happy. And healthy. My husband loves me. And I have given birth to three children for God's sake! That skin around your belly isn't so forgiving after the third kid, [Friend]. It's like it just gives up. It says "Screw it, I'm just going to spread out and get comfortable." And don't even get me started on the boobies. We're talking a whole different level of depression that hasn't even been discovered yet. I totally need some new ones. Sigh.

So yeah. I totally just admitted to you that I am afraid to go to the reunion because I am fat and care too much about what people think. I'm such a loser.

So how have you been?

Good Lord. I need to be banned from FB. It's a wonder I had any friends in High School at all....


kristen s said...

No April, THIS is why you HAVE to go to your reunion! You will be the star of the show! And, not that you have anything to worry about since you're a hottie and all, but it was my experience that people -- well, MOST people -- grew up quite a bit since the 10 year reunion. There were a couple of douchbags, sure, but most people genuinely just wanted to chat, catch up and reminisce. Some people looked better than others, but as a rule, everyone was a little 'fluffier' than they had been when they were 18, which I personally enjoyed immensely. Plus, some of the people had even more wrinkles than me! Since you don't even have any yet, you'll be the belle of the ball! In short, it was NOTHING like the 10 year.

I'll admit, the cost is obnoxious, and the food at mine sucked big hairy donkey balls, but I'd still shell out the cash and do it again. You need to go, because no one else there will be able to get their FUN on unless you do!

"Intentionally Katie" said...

What's funny is that I'm so slow that it took me until seeing [Friend} that this was YOUR message to HER. I was thinking, "No wonder this girl's friends with April. They sound identical!" Yes, pregnancy sucks brain cells. I'm sticking with that...

I've heard (since I'm still five years away...ahem) that the 20 year is so much more fun than the 10 year because people have finally grown up. You can try to stay friends with your clique another 6 years after college, but 10 years, marriages + kids beyond that? Unlikely.

But $200? Dude. I don't blame you. You should have a party for your FB friends the night AFTER the reunion. THAT would be fun and potentially cheaper than $200 if you're careful!

Coffee Bean said...

This post is hilarious!!! You should go!

WILLIAM said...

I think you should go and where the t-shirt that says, "yea I got fat." That would be hysterical.

Gladys said...

Ok here are my thoughts. I attended my 20th reunion and realized that I really didn't know any of those people at all. I mean I haven't lived in my home town for 30 years and honestly I wasn't that close to any of them when I did live there.

The mean girls were still mean, fatter but mean.

The cheerleaders were still stuck-up fatter but stuck up.

The people I talked to all night are the people I have always talked to and still do.

I got dressed up for nuthin.

DevilsHeaven said...

At least you were invited. I, and my "group" of friends weren't invited to the 10 Year "Reunion" because it was really two of our classmates who married each other's 10 year ANNIVERSARY party.
So yeah.
I say if the alkie is free, GO. Surely you can get us at least ONE good blog post out of it.
So really, go for US, your Readers! Screw everyone else!!!!

Karen R said...

Hmm. My 10 year wasn't very much fun, but my 20 year was so much fun that we all agreed to get together every 5 years. My high school is in Michigan, so I had to travel every time. I do agree that everyone has "grown up" by the 20th, but it gets even better as the reunions fly by. Don't feel badly if you want to skip this one, but don't miss anymore starting with the 25th. (And they are smoking dope to charge $200 for a dried out chicken buffet).

Bogart in P Towne said...

If you will wear it to the reunion AND share pictures, I will buy you the T-shirt that says "Yeah, I Got Fat."

And yes, it has to be outside of your clothes...wearing it under a coat or another shirt does not count!

Bobbie B said...

Hey, April, I'm Leigh-Leigh's Momma and I think you should go. You will be the best looking, most charming, funniest, knock-em-dead mama there! I would, however, change the shirt to read "I May Be Fat, But I Can Go On a Diet." Not that you're fat - I've never seen you and I'm sure you are SMASHING! Love your blog. Momma B

Anonymous said...

I think you should wear a t-shirt saying "Yes, I have lost weight. Thank you for noticing."