Saturday, June 13, 2009


I know, right? Like where the heck have I been? I've been neglecting the blog a little. There are weeds growing in my margins and stuff. The blogger HOA is going to start sending me nasty letters. Or something.

So holy cow am I busy these days. I have not done a load of laundry since last Sunday. It's piling up. Mocking me. I actually heard it snicker as I walked by it this morning on my way out the door to go to work. Yes. I am working on a Saturday. Banker's Hours my fat ass. Whoever came up with that phrase should be shot. I mean what a total liar. But check me out. I am such a rebel. I am blogging from work. Shh, don't tell anyone. I am pretty sure that kind of behavior is frowned upon.


Let's finish this post out by me doing what I do best . . . Griping!

(thunderous applause)

Here's what's bugging me this week:

  • In our neighborhood, we have long driveways. Long enough where you can park a car behind another car and still not be in the street. There's a guy who lives four or five doors down from us. He parks his car so that the ass of it is hanging off the driveway. You could park two Mini Coopers in front of his big Old Dude Boat. And yeah. This drives me crazy. And it's none of my business why he parks his car like that but why??? Why does he do that?? Is he just trying to annoy the heck out of me or what? Pull your car all the way forward, dude! Thank you.
  • My daughter gets a new cup every time she needs a drink. This results in 856 cups spread out on my counter throughout the day. I am constantly washing cups. I have told her about fifty bazillion times to use the same cup. So she gets around this by rotating her beverage choices. Milk. Chocolate milk. Water. Orange juice. Lemonade. And no, she can't rinse out the old cup and use it again. "Because that's gross." This is why I don't have time to blog anymore. Because I'm always washing cups.
  • I think I am losing my fascination for celebrity gossip. I don't care if Brad and Angelina break up, or what Spencer and Heidi are up to, or who Miley is dating. And I swear to God I am going to scream if I see one more magazine with Jon & Kate on the cover. I don't care. I don't want to know. All of these people make my stomach turn. I think this is a sign that I am getting old.
  • Which brings me to this point. A few years ago I was diagnosed with Vitiligo. For the most part, my white patches have been hidden. I have patches on each arm that are visible if I wear a really short sleeved shirt, which I rarely do because of my big ole lunch lady arms. But, lately I have noticed the patches on my arms seem to be getting bigger. And I am pretty sure I am developing a patch on my right cheek. Of my face, just to clarify. So dudes, are you still going to be friends with me when I have a big white patch of Michael Jackson disease on my face? Because something like this really brings your vanity out, you know? I'm fine with patches on my arms or legs or hands or whatever, but the face?? Come on. So unfair. Isn't it enough that I have big ears and freckles? Now I am going to have white spots on my face, too? So not cool.
  • Ubes and I watched "He's Just Not That Into You" this week. It was okay. But I think I hated all the female characters because they were all psycho. And the male characters weren't that great either. But I guess if they made a movie about normal people no one would see it because it would be boring. I don't know.

So I guess that's enough griping for now.... I'm home now and the laundry and piles of cups are calling to me. 83 days until vacation....


Katie @ 3 Blondes and a Redhead said...

The girls in "He's Just Not That Into You" weren't psycho as much as they were pathetic and desperate. Didn't you get that vibe? I wanted them to be ditched in the middle of a date or to die old maids. They just seemed...pathetic. Pretty disappointing for such a star-studded cast.

Mom Taxi Julie said...

I thought that movie was pretty good. The book was stupid though. Probably because I'm married and just about everything in there said my husband just wasn't into me.

DevilsHeaven said...

The PARKING!!! Girl I am SO right there with you! Use the dang driveway already!!! I hate driving down the street and playing chicken with the oncoming traffic to see who will move over to the side first because there are cars pakred on BOTH sides!!!!!
And I saw He's Just Not, and since it was based on a "Self Help" book, there's really not that much material there to base a movie on. But as most of these movies go, the BOOK was BETTER.

Sue said...

I'll still be your friend if you had big purple or green spots on your face. But not

The cup thing bugs me too. I buy those red cups from Costco and tell the kids to write their names on them and only use one a day. I'm cheap. It still doesn't work though, at the end of the day I wind up throwing 6 or 8 of them away. None with names. Drives me nuts.

Anonymous said...

I haven't seen the film but the book of 'He's Not That Into You' really annoyed me. I mean, sure, if a guy is ignoring your calls after a really bad first date, he probably isn't looking for another one. But the whole premise of the book is "he hasn't replied to your text within 5 seconds? JUST GET OVER IT. HE PROBABLY HATES YOU."

You know what, maybe all of the guys in my life just hate me.