Sunday, February 15, 2009

Let's Google

I think my blog is turning into a blahg. Time to pull myself up by the bra straps and snap out of my funkiliciousness.

(Oh and PS, I have decided that my psycho-ness is due to being overwhelmed. I am a control FREAK. Surprise! And when things aren't going the way I plan/want/expect/insist, I start to lose it. It's up to me to change my attitude and the way I react . . . or in most cases overreact. So stop wallowing, stop whining, stop fuming and underwhelm yourself, woman! Right?? Right!)

Moving on...

I saw this on a couple of the blogs I stalk and thought it might be fun.

The Google Game

1. Type in “[your name] needs” in the Google search.

April needs . . . a pancreas transplant.

Dear Lord, I hope not. Although maybe that is what's making me such a bitch lately. Does the pancreas have anything to do with your moods? From now on I am blaming everything on my pancreas. Forgetfulness, tardiness, crabbiness, untidiness, etc.

2. Type in “[your name] looks like” in Google search.

April looks like . . . her mother.

This I take as a compliment. My mom is beautiful. Crazy, but beautiful. Wait, maybe it's not the pancreas?? Anyhoo, the second search that popped up said April looks like a ghetto slut. Hilarious. Had to share.

3. Type in “[your name] says” in Google search.

April says . . . you should listen.

And yes, I do say this. Every day. Several times a day. To my children, to my husband. Sometimes to total strangers. It's a very annoying version of I told you so. But still, you should listen. Listening is gooooooood.

4. Type in “[your name] wants” in Google search.

April wants . . . more wine.

Yes, this is true. Especially if it's Project Happiness shared with my girls Erin and Brooke.

5. Type in “[your name] does” in Google search.

April does . . . the business.

Uuuummmm . . . what kind of business are we talking about here?

6. Type in “[your name] hates” in Google search.

April hates . . . Keesha.

This is so not true. Not only do I not hate Keesha, I do not know her. I am sure she is a lovely girl. I don't hate anybody. Seriously Keesha, we are cool.

7. Type in “[your name] asks” in Google search.

April asks . . . Frank out.

Obviously another preposterous rumor spread by the same person suggesting I have a problem with Keesha. I am happily married to a man who spent his entire morning cutting hearts out of construction paper for me. What the heck would I see in Frank?? I mean really?? Ooooh, maybe I could set him up with Keesha?

8. Type in “[your name] likes ” in Google search.

April likes . . . birds.

Oh Google. You could not be more wrong. April is slightly terrified of birds and thinks they are disgusting, disease infested creatures. Not a fan.

9. Type in “[your name] eats ” in Google search.

April eats . . . meat.

It totally depends on the type of meat. But yes, I do eat meat.

10. Type in “[your name] wears ” in Google search.

April wears . . . a smiling face.

Yes, most of the time. Not as much lately, sadly. But that is changing. See. I'm smiling now. Smiling is my favorite.

11. Type in “[your name] was arrested for” in Google Search.

April was arrested for . . . swearing.

OMG Google, are you predicting the future?? Now I am not smiling anymore. In fact, I'm a little scared.

12. Type in “[your name] loves” in Google Search.

April loves . . . black coffee.

Ha ha! Wrongo Google! April prefers her coffee with cream and two sugars! So there! You think you are so smart.

So what have we learned here today? Well, we learned a little more about April. Always interesting. And we also learned a little more about the Google. Apparently not the reliable friend we thought, eh?


Kristi said...

That is damn funny - I'm gonna have to try that. Stay tuned for the mind-bendingly thrilling results!

Katie @ 3 Blondes and a Redhead said...

I learned that you dress like a ghetto slut...but then again, that wasn't news to me!

When I played that game the only Katie that popped was Katie Holmes/Cruise. Everything was about Katie. Apparently, I need to spice things up on Google to keep things interesting. Maybe I could start dressing like a ghetto slut?

Chris H said...

*searching for me bra straps*... I do believe I am the same as you. Pffffft!

Trisha said...

Hee-hee! Just how did you figure out this game? It sounds like fun!

Gladys said...

Glady you are feeling better. Now may I suggest you do something for yourself? A spa treatment? An afternoon spent sipping tea and reading a good book? A trip away from the daily grind?

I googled and it said Gladys is Cooking. Well of course I'm cooking.

Karen R said...

You made me laugh about the birds because I feel the exact same way. In fact, Larry got mad at me because we took Cole to the Phx Zoo and one of those critters got in front of me and without thinking, I kicked him out of my way. Larry said "NICE - you kick an animal at the ZOO!" And I don't think you're psycho or peri-menipausal or anything other than a normal working mom who has 10,000 things to juggle in a world loaded with morons. You're doing the best you can.

Mom Taxi Julie said...

Off to do this, sounds entertaining :)

Coffee Bean said...

You always make me laugh... you nut!

The Maid said...

Becky is talking about herself in the third person after playing that game. I'm putting the answers up on my blog! :) Too funny.