Friday, January 16, 2009

I wanna be like Mike

I have this friend. We'll call her . . . uuuuuhhhhh . . . Sunshine. So Sunshine always has a really positive Facebook status. Like "Sunshine just got home from a beautiful afternoon at the park with her awesome kids!" Or "Sunshine feels great and is about to hit the gym!"

Oh how I envy Sunshine. Because my Facebook status is more like "April just ate half a pizza, 6 cookies, an ice cream and a bag of Cheetos and wonders why she can't get her fat ass off the couch to walk to the mailbox." Or "April just spent the morning scraping dried up toothpaste out of the boys' bathroom sink and is now listing two kids on Craig's List." Sunshine would never say any of that.

I need to be more like Sunshine. I need to focus on the positive. Try to see the good in everything. Put down the Cheetos and take my kids to the park.

I have another friend. Let's call her . . . Martha. Martha is organized. Martha has everything put away. In rubbermaid containers. Which are labeled. And alphabetized. And even her labels are cute and fun. Martha never has to search for three days to find a copy of the title to the car her husband is about to sell. And I am sure Martha never has to call her insurance agent for another copy of her proof of car insurance because she lost the last three he sent. And I know for a fact Martha would not just misplace an entire pair of brown tweed pants. She would not have to check the laundry room, the bathroom hamper, the closet, the chair in the bedroom, the pile of clothes to go to the dry cleaner, the bags that just came from the dry cleaner, or even call the dry cleaner and accuse them of not returning a pair of pants only to be told that her receipt plainly stated she dropped off 5 pairs of pants and 5 pairs of pants were returned. And she would know this if she had not lost her receipt. Oh no, Martha's pants would be hanging in the closet where they belonged.

I need to be more like Martha. I need to simplify my life. Get rid of my clutter. Put things away and not leave stuff all over the place. Teach my kids the importance of taking care of things.

One of my other friends, we'll call her Serenity, doesn't worry about things. She doesn't let things bother her and she never takes anything personally. If we are driving down the road and someone honks at her, she'll smile and wave at them and say "I'm sorry" even though they can't hear her. Even if she did nothing wrong and the person honking is just being a jerk. She'll laugh it off and forgive that person for being rude "They are probably having a bad day. I'll pray for them." Serenity is never worried about the future. Why? Because she has no control of it. "I can't see tomorrow. Why worry about it?" She doesn't get her feelings hurt by others. "I can't control how other people feel about me. All I can do is treat them with kindness and forgive when they don't return the favor."

I need to be more like Serenity. I need to stop letting things bother me so much. Who cares if the crossing guard/PE teacher at the kids' school yelled at me for not pulling out onto the street even though he was waving me on? He obviously couldn't see there was a car coming. What does it matter that he screamed "Go lady! What are you waiting for??" And even though I really wanted to, I can see now it would not have done me any good to jump out of the car and tackle him to the ground, yank the stupid stop sign out of his hand and smack him upside his bald little head with it. I should have prayed for the man because he obviously needs Jesus. I need to let things go and stop worrying about what I can't control.

So it's taken me a while, but these are my resolutions:

Be more positive with my words.
Move more.
Take care of myself. Everything in moderation.
Spend better time with the kids.
Put things away.
Simplify and declutter.
Let it go.
Laugh it off.
Stop controlling everything.

And just for fun:

Try something new every month. New food, new product, new hobby, whatever. Just try something different. Stretch out a little, expand my horizons. Leave my comfort zone. Shake it up.

But most importantly, still be me. Just improved.


Mary said...

Thank you so much for that laugh, April. There are so many Marthas among my facebook friends it frightens me sometimes. Glad to hear I'm not the only crazy one some days. The 5 cookies I just ate thank you for the dose of reality.

Oh yeah, and would you let me know what kids are going for on Craigslist these days, k? My boys are 3 and 5 if that is helpful...

Trisha said...

I think we all have those friends who do better than we on certain things. I am sustained by the fact that there HAS to be something that I do better than them!

Good luck with the resolutions!

Gladys said...

It is a matter of perspective. I see myself as organized. I have my own system. My family sees me as a mess. :)

Sandra in Phx said...

I was wondering how you knew I had Rubbermaid containers with labels on them?! Cuz we are not FB friends...I just spent 8 hours in my boys' room yesterday reorganizing everything. All in labeled containers with lids:)

Mary said...

I actually giggled when she mentioned the labeled containers, Sandra. I just assumed that you two were FB friends.;)

I should have written Sunshine in the first post. LOL It's the Sunshine's of the world that I have in abundance on FB. If I see another post about how wonderful children are and how life with them is nothing but sunshine and roses... I might not be responsible for my actions. hee hee

Katie @ 3 Blondes and a Redhead said...

SO true, my friend. Don't we all wish we could be a little more like certain aspects of others we know? That's why I love Desperate Housewives. Total guilty pleasure, but it shows that everyone has their issues, even if they seem to have it altogether. (you know, like my husband might have secretly run over your husband with his car and that's why he was in a coma...totally reality at its best)

Just remember that Sunshine might be married to Oscar the Grouch, so she has to stay sunny to keep from going postal on her family...even-ing out the mood of the house and all. Just sayin'...

Julie said...

Wow. I really needed this. I feel just like this all the time, and feel constantly that I fall short as a wife/mother/friend and human being.

Thanks for sharing, it helps to know that as women we tend to all feel the same way at times.

Mom Taxi Julie said...

LOL I think there are more of us like you than the others!

Coffee Bean said...

You are a HOOT!!! Number one, vanilla in your diet coke is gross. I mean... eeewww! Try lime. It is soooo much better. I was cracking up. And... OH MY GOSH!!! Poor poor Mrs. McFluffy!

WILLIAM said...

Is serenity a stripper? It sounds like a stripper name?

The Fat Girl said...

haha is so true we all have friends like this. Good luck with the resolutions!