I've had some extra time on my hands lately and so I have had a chance to do a little self discovery. And guess what I have found out? I'm weird. No seriously, I am a freak. Here's how I know:
1. I eat my chips from smallest to largest and save the folded ones for last. Then I eat the folded ones from smallest to largest. I really do this. I actually physically separate them on the plate according to size. And if you are wondering why I am eating chips when I am supposed to be working on Operation Smokin' Hot April . . . bite me.
2. I get so irritated if there are crumbs or food debris inside the microwave. I am anal about wiping it out. When I open that door, I want to see nothing but white. If I see crumbs, popcorn butter or the residue of whatever blew up in there when Uberman used it last, I want to rip my hair out from root. And yet there are piles of unfolded laundry in baskets in my room and I could care less.
3. I am completely addicted to chapstick. I always have one in my makeup bag, one in this little basket on my vanity, one in my nightstand and at least one in my purse. If I can't find one, I start to freak out a little. Like dry chapped lips are going to send me over the edge.
4. I have a routine when I am getting ready in the morning. If any part of that routine is followed out of order, I feel uneasy the rest of the day. Seriously, aren't people on medication for stuff like that?
5. Boo has these sippy cups with straws that flip out of the lid. If Uberman gives her a drink in one and doesn't make sure the lid matches the appropriate cup, it irritates the hell out of me. And yes, he does it just to watch me roll my eyes and search the cabinet for the right lid. He thinks it's hilarious. Me? Not so much.
6. I have a stack of People magazines I am catching up on. I can not and will not read them out of order. I am reading them from oldest to newest. And even though I am dying to read the latest one, I won't until I have read all the others that came before it.
7. Uberman sold some D-Backs tickets on StubHub and asked me to mail them out for him. I checked the tickets at least four times before I left the house to make sure they were for the right date. And then I checked them again when I got in the car and then again before I put them in the envelope at FedEx. And still, it drove me crazy for the rest of the day. Did I send out the right tickets?? I checked the book of tickets again when I got home. Even though I knew I sent out the right ones.
Look, it's not like I am some psycho neat freak or anything. I mean my house is complete chaos. I probably shouldn't share this with the rest of the world, but there are enough crumbs on my kitchen floor right now to feed a small village in Africa. And yet I am up here in the mess that is the office blogging.
But . . . if there was anything in the microwave? I would not be up here. I would be cleaning it right now and I would not be able to sleep tonight until I was sure it is clean. And yes, I check it before I go to bed.
See, I told you.
Now if you will excuse me, I need to go check my microwave again.