Monday, July 21, 2008

Random Crapola

Happy Monday!

Seriously, don't you just want to slug people who say that? Anyhoozers, there's a lot going on in my life right now. More than I want to get into at the moment. But never fear, no one is dying or anything. So I thought I would do a bullet point post today. Just some random items that I felt were noteworthy. You might not think so, but hey - It's my blog baby.

And here we go....

  • Did a Starbucks run at lunch today. Well it's actually a Starbucks drive, isn't it? I mean it's officially 187 degrees outside so we all know this plus size girl was not running anywhere. Why do they call it plus size? I mean plus what? A bigger ass? Plus more fabric in the thighs? Really, anyone know? No?? Okay, let's move on. The closest Starbucks is at least a whole quarter of a mile from work. Seriously, who is going to walk that far? Anyway, the reason this Starbucks drive was so significant was because today, I had for the first time ev-ah . . . a mocha frapuccino. I know! Hello 21st Century, my name is April. Pleased to meet you (curtsy). And in case any of you are wondering, I usually prefer my coffee like I like my men - tall, hot and covered in whip cream. Oh my! I can't believe I just said that! It's the caffeine talking. No, really.

  • The funniest thing I saw this weekend was Boo standing at the top of the stairs, iPod head phones in her ears, shaking her money maker and belting out Linkin Park's What I've Done at the top of her lungs. Eyes closed, tiara on her head and full on jazz hands extended. Not a care in the world. Precious!

  • Saturday Uberman and Junior went to a special event for Diamond Backs season ticket holders at Chase Field. There was a raffle for tickets in the batter's box for tonight's game against da Cubs. Junior won!! I don't know who was more excited, Junior or Uberman. We have really good seats anyway, but hello - these are directly behind home plate on the field level! ($400 each!) Every time they show someone up to bat, Junior and Uberman will be on TV, grinning like little kids. Well one of them is a kid, but you get what I mean. Watch for them and let's all pray the D-Backs don't blow it like they did yesterday. Idiots.

  • I tell y'all in my 101 things that I am allergic to weird stuff like zucchini and halibut. I know, I don't get it either. So yesterday we went up to my Mom and Dad's for dinner and to drop off Boo and Mac who are staying with them until Thursday. My mom made the most delicious dinner - the Best Salad in the World (officially), scalloped potatoes, fresh corn on the cob grilled to perfection, homemade bread and . . . fresh halibut they caught on their trip to Alaska a few weeks ago. I had not eaten halibut in 20 years, I really thought maybe I had outgrown my allergy. No such luck. But it was so worth it. Not only was it delish, but I slept AWESOME last night due to my two doses of Benadryl. And the hives have actually given my normal pasty white skin a little color today. It's been a win-win, so yay!

  • My mother cracked me up yesterday and this is probably a "you had to be there" story, but I am sharing anyway. She lives in Podunk Small Hick Town Arizona, and it's lovely. Everyone has a gun rack in the rear window of their pick up and their main street consists of a post office, a volunteer fire department, a gas station and a "restaurant" that serves pizza and ribs. Seriously. So anyway, they live in a cul de sac and she was giving me all the gossip on the neighbors. Nothing too bad, just the usual small town stuff - This guy refused to chip in to have the road paved and this guy caught his wife with someone else, this lady makes the best pies, and then she totally threw me with "And this guy is really nice and I think he's gay because he likes cats." Seriously almost peed my pants from laughing. I mean who needs gaydar? Just give the guy a cat and see how he handles it. Right? My mother is FUNNY!

  • I got a package in the mail this weekend from the lovely Gigglepotamus (Okay Blogger's being a poopie head and not letting me hyperlink right now so check her out in my blogroll to your right, she rocks!). I had ordered one of her adorable t-shirts for my youngest nephew, Smiley McChubbyThighs. It turned out so flipping adorable, I can hardly wait to give it to him for his first birthday. So I was showing it to Uberman and he asked where I got it and I said "My friend Lauren made it." And he says "Who's Lauren?" And then I realize, I have never met her. I only know her through the blogosphere and email. But I feel like we are friends. How weird is that?? I had this same conversation with Caitlin from Bread and Cheese. (Again, refer to blogroll on the right. Your other right! Sheesh!) Which brings me to my next bullet...

  • A lot of people have asked me why I have two blogrolls, so I thought I would explain. The one on the top, or as I affectionately call it, The Queen's Court, is made up of people I know personally or are friends of friends (like Chandy, DutchMac and the awesome Brenda). The list titled The Queen Likes to Read, are people I have never met, but regularly read their blogs. And many of them feel like friends. It's a crazy thing. There are many other blogs I frequent and have not taken the time to list yet, but I feel the same way. Thanks for sharing your stories with me and taking the time to read mine.

That's it for now. Thanks for indulging me today. This was a sucky post. Maybe I should have put that part at the top and saved you some time?? Oh well - Happy Monday!! Muah-ha-ha! (That's supposed to be me cackling, in case you were wondering.)


kristen s said...

Allergic to zucchini? Say it isn't so! I guess I probably already knew this, since I've read your 100 plus one facts and all, but I must not have taken notice before.

I LOVE zucchini, and I'm just so sad for you that you're allergic. I like it cooked the healthy way, but (no big surprise here) my obvious favorite would be fried, with ranch dressing to dip it in. In fact, this is one of my death row foods.

Have you ever pondered what you'd order on death row for your final meal? Mine would be fried zucchini with ranch, fettucine alfredo and a whole mess of krispy kreme donuts, all washed down with an icy diet coke. I know, none of it's figure friendly, but give me a break, they're about to execute me! Who gives a crap, right? Game over.

I remember one lady I read about who ordered a fruit plate. Are you kidding me? A fruit plate? She really was a loony. Her attorney really should have tried harder for the whole insanity defense thing. (BTW, I'm not planning on killing anyone or anything, I just believe in being prepared.) If you're looking for blog topics, you should do a blog one day about your death row meal!

Oh, and congrats on your mocha frappucino! I am in awe of you because I am so intimidated by the whole ordering process that I barely ever muster up the courage to go to Starbucks. I always order a small mocha with skim milk, and I know there's some hip, trendy way to state that to the "barrista", but my social anxiety disorder takes over and I'm lucky to remember why I'm there in the first place once it's my turn. (I just know they're judging me...) If it was good, tell me how to order it and I'll try one for myself one day when I'm feeling BOLD.

I'm gonna keep my eyes peeled for Uberman and Junior! I haven't seem 'em in years, but I bet I can pick them out if I get a good look. The boys in my house would be so jealous of those seats!

Kristi said...

Cat gaydar is awesome! She really needs her own blog.

chandy said...

What's a mocha frappucino? (oops, have I just outed myself as lame?)

for a different kind of girl said...

Beware those mocha frapps! I remember my first taste. I was a regular at the Starbucks after that! It's even more dangerous now, because there's a cafe in the bookstore, and I can get those delicious cups of fantasticness for half price!

Sometimes, after I've been on a frapp bender, I, too, will stand at the top of my stairs with the iPod on, totally performing like you described up there.

Sometimes without the frapp fuel!

DevilsHeaven said...

The 21st century has been calling my name for YEARS. I don't drink coffee period, let alone hang out with any of it's multiple personalities of cap, or latte' or half skim or anyone else.
Maybe my anti-coffee stance has to do with my anti-bean/veggie stance? Cause you know, uh, coffee comes from a bean?
Yeah, ok, shutting up now.

Katie said...

I'm a new lover of all things zucchini, too. Now I'm thinking about what I would have on death row, thanks to your friend Kristen. A dozen Krispy Kremes would be at the top of the list for sure. They'd have to be fresh off the line, though. And the brownie fudge sundae from Houston's. I get enough "real" food...bring on the sugar if I'm about to die!

Sue said...

Your post sucky? Are you kidding me? You always rock, whether you are talking about a busted air conditioner, kids fighting, a dipsh!t at the gas station...or whatever. You are always good to put a smile on my face.

I am a mocha frap. LOVER, but even better was last year, when, for a brief time, Starbucks offered Malt powder to put in their drinks. A Mocha Malt Frap. was the BEST! I either wiped them out of malt, or they discontinued it, either way it sucks that I can't get in any more...

Now you've got me wondering if my VERY frequent visits to Starbucks have anything to do with me being "plus size"...hahahaha! I guess I shouldn't wonder! (How bout plus whip cream and malt!)

Anonymous said...

This post was so not sucky!